Multi-chapters
i was so darn sleepy today. i woke up early i think.. got me some breakfast and when i got here went again to sleep. woke up to eat lunch then again..went back to sleep after(i went online for a couple mins before sleeping). then woke up around 5pm and yes did not stay online too long and went back to sleep. if ill shut my eyes right now, surely ill go to a very deep slumber again.
i called yellow cab early this evening to have me delivered some pizza. while i waited i fell yeah.. SLEEEP!!! then i was awakened by someone knocking at my door. Its the delivery guy from yellow cab.
im currently inhabiting one of the 15 semi-lodge-slash-apartment type of uhmm place? its one big building, the 5 rooms including where i am right now has one king size bed-slash-living area, a tv w/ cable, a bathroom, a semi-dining area (a sink ,2 tall chairs,counter-slash-table with a mini-fridge on the side), and a microwave. its not really that big, just enough for 1-2 occupants..3 is well crowded already. then at the side of the building is a uhmm Multiplex(sounds like a multivitamins name) its more than a duplex coz there are 10 of them lined identicaly (two-storey houses that looks exactly the same). all of them are occupied mostly by families. so ive got a bunch of neighbors around. the building where im stayin, i think there where only 6 rooms unoccupied right now. and the rest of the neighborhood, well its composed of big ass houses/mansions whatever u wanna call them surrounding the rest of the area. then it has its country club (golf course, basketball court both indoor and outdoor), swimming pool, gym, function halls, and a club resto. and the place is way secured.
a friend of ours is leaving for Australia and everyone is invited to her going-away dinner party. Its like a 45-minute drive to her family's place.. ive been there its pretty cool. the place is rural inside out. its a haven of farm lands and rest houses. its not warm and everything around is green and a whole lotta fruits. and yes im going there tomorrow.
one night, there was this dog who can't go inside his owners house he was crying outside coz he was all wet. He was left alone since his owners are still out dunno where. i cant let him in the building coz its not allowed. so instead i made him a shelter out of rubber and plies scraps. and yeah i got wet too... but its ok. coz if i didnt helped the dog its really something that i cant get out of my conscience. teehee!
sorry. don't read!
a message alert sounded off my fone. the no. started with +44... read it... a long one. but i was not thrilled. this has got to stop.
its been weeks now. it started with the usual news and updates about how you've been doing and the latest buzz of people we both know.
but the latter part. the air seems to change... your back again haunting me. and its pretty annoying and scary at the same time.
this is about my ex (my 2nd to d last ex), she's back again in her scarecrow persona. and sadly the only thing she's gonna scare is me. i lost you and every hope i once had when i found out the truth. she was the longest girl i ever had a serious relationship with. she was smart, preserved, strong-willed, and very outspoken. she was 2 yrs older than me but i was the mature one when it comes to our relationship. with me around with her for long, she became too dependent, even her decisions seems to make her feel insecure. i was also vocal when it comes to what needs to be done and straighten up.. and she did agree with that. we sometimes have this straight forward talk on how and what we dont like about each other. and it was really good. it showed that we can improve on something. and it showed that we could grow out of that. so everything was really smooth between us. we were not just lovers but we were each other's bestfriends. we both loved to talk and we do converse a lot. from morbid stories to plain gossips we often indulge for hours and we dont get enervated by each other on that long and series of talks. even if sometimes we tend to repeat what has talked about the other day. everytime we talk we just clicked right away. one time she had to be away for a while. she was gettin another degree in another school, she lived with two of her bestfriends whom one was her classmate and the other was already working. they were housemates in one big house near their campus. we communicate everyday. cellphones, Ims, video chats, e-mails and even snail mails (which by the way i needed motivation to work on since im just too lazy to write) but if it makes her happy then im gonna do it. so i wrote her a couple of letters during her being away. even if it contained less than a page, she still loves it. that's because she envies my handwriting(lol). actually yeah its true, she was very insecure with the way she writes. ***i dont get it why she liked mine when in fact my mum always inveighs me about my handwriting where she couldnt read a thing since its too small and too thin.*** and each time we talked it was just so funny coz im all blushed when she tells me how she reReads my letters over and over. quite flattering considering im not good in storytelling. yeah that was some of the good part we had together. and the part where she seems to point me out as one of her personal hero and point of admiration. in short, i was her life and she revolves around me.
our road became rocky when she became one heck of a nagger and pestering me with her skepticisms of my being faithful. which i found so lame and very neurotic. i was truly faithful and everytime ive proven myself she'll be apologizing in the end for her lack of trust. she said she just dont want to lose me.. and i told her that if she keeps on doing that she might lose me with her own doings. our relationship began to make me feel vexatious when her unfaithful speculations kept popping like almost every day. i asked her where she'd get that..and why would it ever come into her mind... and i told her bluntly that people who tend to do that are the ones whose really doing it. then she cried.
one of my "bestfriend" was also going to where she was(almost a month before that issue of my faithfulness came out of nowhere).
he doesnt know anything about that place , so i told him that maybe she could help out, like look for apartments and such. so she agreed. she knew him already months after we two went dating. though they dont really know each other too well. so yeah she did help him out. and they even call me when theyre together. she tells me how she didnt like my bestfriend coz of some attitude probs.. and i told her just let it go. so weeks passed my bestfriend's gf went over there. and he introduced her to them (my gf and her friends). all she did everynight when she called was tattle about my bestfriend and her gf, she even told me weird stories about the two which made us laugh like minutes long while talking. we havent seen each other for quite some time and we both missed each other. she keeps on telling me how she misses me. i told her ill be visiting soon. every day she tells me to hurry coz she's overly excited. and so was i.
one night her "other self" visited her again.. and then the next day..then it lasted for one straight long week. we fought mostly over the fone and it was a waste of time talking about it since it was all false accusations..and one day i simply asked her what's wrong..
she started to cry..i can hear her weep. then she started tellin me how much she misses me. and how much she loves me..and because of that wanting.. and how she needs my presence... and the part when she said that something happened to her and my bestfriend. while she was in the middle of telling me. in some weird way i felt that someone just wiped my soul out of me. at some point i felt that my heart just stopped beating. that i just totally lost my strength. i was not able to say a word. she was asking me to say something. she even told me to yell at her, be mad at her, cuss her all the effin words i could say unto her. but no words would come out. she even asked if i was still on the other line coz even my breathing..she can hear no more. then i put down the phone.. confused..and trying to snap back..trying to feel if it was all real..or was it just a dream. but, it was real...
she kept on calling me right after i put down the fone, leaving me msgs since i wasnt answering. i disconnected all my lines. i just needed peace..i needed to think. i turned back on eveything in the morning... and she instantly called.. and the first thing she heard from me was.. "why?" and she cried again. cried so hard that i ended up holding back my tears trying so hard not to cry also.
she was having a hard time uttering her words because she just cried and cried. so i put down the fone again. left her a msg to talk to me when she could reason out clearly.
i, was trying to be numb myself of what had happened..well, it wasnt that hard.. coz it felt like a building fell over me. then she called again, and she all she could say was sorry. and i wasnt up to that yet. i asked when it all happened... and she said when she started to tell me all that accusations and when she started to feel so insecure.. and so i said to myself.. i was right.. i was right all along.. i was soooo damn right about what i just told her. i wasnt the problem, i wasnt the one who was unfaithful.. it was her.. she did all of it. worse, it did not happen once... and she wanted to convince me that she was out of her mind..that she just misses me so much..and the only person she could have that time, that will sort of link her to me was my bestfriend.
so, was my absentee the main reason? so, was that my fault? so, if i havent told her to meet up with him, none of these would have happened.. but if it wasnt my bestfriend..if it was another guy i dont know of..would you ever tell me? would the disclosure really happen? or will you just keep it secret like how you did it with him for too long? i was laughing with you guys..and i was so blind to not see what was going on. the fact...that you both cheated on the people you loved.
so i told her it was over. it was just too painful. so i had to be away.. to not in any way talk, msg, write her and that goes to her also.. i wont be taking calls from her, i wont be responding to any form of communication.. i just had to find myself..find a way to move out..and move on.
so i did really have not heard from her for almost 5 months after that break up. then one day.. my fone rang... and yes, i havent deleted her no. so hey i think im ok. and i think the pain helped me in moving on and erased every feelings that i have for her. so i answered... i was in a happy mood that day.. so we talked..and then it became awkward when she started saying how her life was so miserable.. my bestfriend never left his girlfriend since the girl did not know a thing about what had happened.
she was in comfort with her friends.. and even one of them begged me one time to see her and check on her. i just couldnt do that. so she told me how much she still loves me.. and if i cant give that same love again, she would understand..and asked me if we could be friends..so i accepted the offer of us being friends again.
then we talked most of the time.. like we were old friends. she talks about school and stuff..she even asks for help with some of her papers. and whenever she attempts to ask me about something else..i would stop her right away.. i asked her to not go there anymore. and just maintain the friendship we had. it went well for a month..then two.. then.. one day.. she said she couldnt help it..she just wants me back..into her life..that she could no longer bear of us just being friends..she wanted more.
i, was over it. i wanted the friendship. i, no longer want to go thru all that pain with her. i, was just hurt way overboard. so it was not on my list of things i wanted to go back. so i told her NO.
she said she needs time.. she was not over me. she couldnt get over me when im around, so i told her i must leave her. and even if it felt like our friendship went to drain..but its something we just had to do that..
she said she will just devote her time with school and other stuff and will not be seeing me anymore. i agreed since its for the best..for us to move on..especially for her.
again, we havent heard from each other in the next months..got myself a girlfriend (my last ex! HAHAHA!)
then just one same o day.. i would just hear from her.. since she would just rang and would like to talk to me. it was ok.. but again..just the last time.. it would end up in something else, something else that she wants.. so i had to drop the talk to not go beyond what i cant give anymore.
even until now, she keeps on doing that.. first she leaves me messages.. she tells me stuff..a lil gossip here and there.. and....... those very long messages of how much she still loves me..and how she can never learn to get over me..even after years of trying so hard to do so.
im sorry.. i just cant go back anymore. no matter how much i tried to find you inside me.. its just not there any more.
sorry.
****my bestfriend until now did not say a thing about what had happened to them. he eventually went on with his life. he's now based in Hong Kong and one time we were both back home he never went to visit me or even tried to contact me. oooh he did spoke to me once..when he found out about the break up.
she did not tell him that she already told me because my "bestfriend" told her before to not tell me about it. so i told her not to tell him that she already told me. *confusing? hehehe* so that was the last time i spoke to him. he asked why my gf and i separated... i told him another reason.. that it just wasnt meant to be.. i did not tell him that i already knew..
NBA Opening Night
I was able to watch Miami Heat vs Chicago Bulls.
not really a fan of the defending champs..so i was uhmm VERY HAPPY with the result.
a whooping 42 point score difference and whatta big blow for the whoweee defending champs.. that's a freakin new record for an opening night blowout! nyahaha!
Chicago won 108 against Miami 66. nyahhhhhhh! so yeah am happy..i watched it live this morning. im waiting for Pao and Ash to pick me up.. so we all could go together at the cemetery. "WALANG BAWAL" that's what they said. Its a private cemetery daw kasi so anything goes as long as WALANG MAGULO. each has private tents and stuff. Security personnel are uhmm watching outside the gate... mostly the ermm "tenants" hahaha! have their own vehicles so its way too hassle to inspect all those coming in.
they said theyd be here by 9pm.. and its Tequila Night. Bring in your Best Tequila!!!! woooooweeeeeeeee!!!!
Candid Secrecy
so bro! you're now married without telling us? wait, others knew but most did not! and now its the biggest issue in our family, just almost a year passed during that previous issue regarding your sister's wedding. gaaahhh! i know you dont want this, just that you mum (my aunt) is making all the fuzz. no not just that, she starts the whole "issue" thing. if not for her, things would be real smooth. the issue isnt that bad but it turned out funny and irksome at the same time with the hodgepodge that aunt did. just hoping this wont turn out that biggie.. but still it is an issue.. *bummer*
a year ago, your younger sister got married with her well-accepted (by us and we thought ur mum too) boyfriend-now-hubby. it turned out during the day of the wedding or say DAY before the wedding aunt went MIA. yes she did, why? she doesnt want her ONLY daughter get married for some lame reason. So she vanished but it didnt stopped my cousin from getting married. most of us were there even our grandma. Their eldest bro stand-in as a parent for her sister since their mum went MIA and their dad, well he's the one who died of cancer. I dont know where our aunt went or what she did during that time but what she did was just one biggie of a story and a joke of all time.
Then this, her other son, her next to the eldest son. Now married. i know this cuzn wants or say was eager to get married for uhmm 3 yrs now. He has everything, he is VERY STABLE FINANCIALLY. and here, my aunt again is out of her sanity. the antagonist of marriage... errr.. why so? because you don't want your instant-go-to-son ever get married so you can have him whenever you want him... you're making his life miserable...cant you get it? he wants to have a family.. for crying out loud. he aint a baby no more.
How come with your eldest son (i can surely say favorite son) when he told you he wants to marry his one hell of a liar-bitch gf-now-wifey you supported him all the way through? even if what? just nearly 6 months after his bitch-wifey bore a perfectly healthy and fully developed baby (full-termed pregnancy).. oh my fucking errr..that one was hell of a news.. why? because they werent even together that long with my cuzn. and that bitch-wifey of his is claiming that, that child was his and they believe (my cuzn and my aunt). what the... where's biology101 or sex education in that? because of that my mum and my aunt was pretty much on a distant mode with each other. because theyre blaming my mum that she sort of spread the news.. OH C'MON! even my mum would zip her mouth (which she really did) people would really notice..even your late husband's relatives noticed it.. my mum didnt meddle.. my other older cuzns spread jokes around.. yeah sure.. of course they have their own family and they know what it takes to MAKE A CHILD! errr! so dont blame my mum on it. besides you two are fooled by your bitch daughter in-law. its not us whose walking our heads off.. its you and ur stupid son. errr.
ok back to her other son. the one who just got married. he's the silent type, hates gossip and crowds..and now..what did ur mum do...? man...i feel sorry for you guys. well, since it was suppose to be not really secret but just a really simple civil wedding, one of my uncle (mum and aunt's youngest bro) went with them not knowing that they have to stop over on that wedding which he did not know is going to happen. errr (haba!)
he thought that the purpose of them goin together was to go at my grandma and visit my grandpa at the cemetery. but their uhmm route diverted..and when my uncle found out about the "other" plan. he and his kids took off and continued their travel towards my grandma's place(which by the way is still half way from that place they did the stop).
my uncle wanted to visit my grandma together with his kids coz theyre going to live in the US next year. and he also thought that in some way its his going-away party coz my mum's other bros are goin to meet up with them at grandma's.
Thats including my aunt and some other cuzns. but instead the reason why my aunt went was not for them to go at my grandma but its for that secret wedding.. blaaahhh! to make things simple, my uncle was just something that my aunt wants to jive with on that travel. he's not even invited so why would he come with them.. all the time he thought the time and the travel was meant for him..coz that was what he was told!
and because of that..the supposedly secret wedding went completely out..the news spread fast as a lighting.. kudos to SMS and international roaming! HAHAHAHA!
i watched Open Season and i want these two!!!
The blue porcupine - "Buddy...!"
The scottish squirrel - "Oi!"
Remembering Them
so have you remembered yours?
mine.. well, i just can't visit them especially that im way far overseas. even back then i don't visit much, not coz i don't want to. its just that like my grandpa (mum's dad) is just way far, in another continent! same as my two cousins (mum's side).
the first one was older (vinnie) he died due to kidney failure, transplant was the last option but it was so hard to find an exact match for him. he died at the age of 24 (he was attending law school that time)his classmates before are now successful lawyers.
my other cousin (JJ) died 4 yrs ago.. i was 20 he was 21 and since we were almost at the same age, him and i where the ones who get along with lots of things way back when we were kids.. yep, my cousins who are of same age as ours, we tend to be sort of a groupie in some relatively way. so yeah, he died unexpectedly/sudden...not coz of a horrible-freak accident... no...
errr.. ok.. he died coz he took his own life.
then an uncle died coz of cancer.
then my grandma's bro died coz of uhmm old age?
i, by the way was able to see him during his last days. bedridden at the hospital, i was the one near him that's why theyve asked me to see him if i have time off. most of his kids has family now and only one was left with him since the rest where at the US now living as US citizens.
he wasnt able to speak much and this time he totally couldnt remember anything.. not even the names of his kids. i was with 3 straight nights relieving one of my aunt. while she sleeps, i look after him. it was 3 straight nights..and the fourth night i wasnt there, i went back early in the morning after the 3rd night since i was called back in the office. it was too late to go back at the hospital so i just stayed at my apartment for the night and my aunt to me to get some rest too..
that night i dreamt about him, he was actually very happy in that dream and we talked a lot which by the way i cant remember, the ones that i can remember was when he was saying that he was so happy that he is all well and he could really rest now. he was smiling all the time and even thanked me, i was confused in that dream, confused why he was telling me all that.
then i was waken up by a call.. its my aunt, informing me that he passed away.
my dad's father.. i did not have the chance to see him or know what's he like xept from the photos. he died when dad was in the middle of senior year in HS.
my other grandpa died because of an accident, it took months to save him and kept him in this world. my mum was with him when he was transported by a helicopter in and out of the city. (she hates riding helicopters by the way) since he was the only grandpa ive known and really lived with for some time, he was also the best. all of us his lil ones where very close to him. he was like a santa claus grandpa.. and he aint strict at all. he was very cool! so most of us grandchildren where pretty much spoiled brats when it comes to him.
Here's a 3 column layout. you can add image for your header or just plain text or just remove it. hehehe!
http://www.sharebigfile.com/file/15127/3columncodes.txt.html
Both layouts has fixed backgrounds, no banners used, plain div tags...
Joan Jett Layout preview:
Download file here:
http://www.sharebigfile.com/file/15060/jjsourcecode.txt.html
scroll down the page of the host site to get the security code for downloading. thanks.
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Avril Lavigne Layout preview:
Download file here:
http://www.sharebigfile.com/file/15065/alsourcecode.txt.html
scroll down the page of the host site to get the security code for downloading. thanks.
***Maan sweetie, if you don't like the layout po.. ill give you the codes for the plain 3 column layout or just tell me what you want to do or if you have other images na gusto ilagay....
***Johanna! here's the div style for your pix...
http://www.sharebigfile.com/file/15124/scroll-pix.txt.html
Holy MicrowavableSsS
the holy part..well credit to holy kettle for that.. i bought 2 large packs for myself ONLY. no..not those unpopped ones..those they say... HAND POPPED EVERYDAY.. i wonder how they use their hands for popping.. hmmmmm..... *thinks*
So yesterday, just as ive said.. i went out all day.. got a chat hangover with abba the night before that..then after like 2hrs somethin of sleep...got up..ate bfast.. went out..and out..home..out..out...til i saw another sunrise...:D
that yesterday afternoon, i even went to CJ's family store thingie.. hahaha! her parents owns a Store (General Merchandise), her parents are sooo chinese! they even speak chinese with each other.. so that customers wont know what on earth they're talking about. She helps out on weekends (sometimes). Yung Mum nya ang bilis mag compute.. not only those that include money but also when she calculates areas and such.. nagbebenta din kasi sila ng sheets/canvas (different kinds;a whole lotta kinds)same with rubbers and the like. and they talk soooo fast..lol! i couldnt understand a thing. i waited for CJ til the store closes..well.she sneaks out before it did close. :D
so having not nuff sleep didnt really urhmm stop me from sleeping like a log for the rest of the SUNday. instead i went out again. hah! well... CJ and I went out for lunch. We ate at Chowking since there's not much peepz in that area. we stayed there till 1pm when CJ received a text msg from her Tito that if she could check out his wife and kids..since theyre at the hospital's emergency room.
CJ's 10-yr old cuzn fainted in the middle of the priest's homily. teehee! just makin sure everythin was ok..the doc took a tube-full of blood from her for tests. errr. and the result...well everything is normal. "nataranta lang si tita kasi on and off daw yung lagnat ni dale e."...ahh...ok...
After visiting her Tita and the kids.. CJ and I went to the mall, she needs a new microwave oven.. i told her to go for stainless ones.. easier to clean unlike enamel coated ones. hahaha! and also those digital menus. GE has one model left with stainless EVERYTHING but its way too BIG... whirlpool they dont have stainless ones shown/stocks.. theyve got moon silver colors.. electrolux on the other hand has only enamel coated ones.. sleek design and colors..no digital menus. errr.. just go for whirlpool.. just the right size and just the perfect digi menus. so yeah.. i did all the installing part when we got back at her place.. *im now a certified service crew of whirlpool/now where's my service fee?oh sorry i forgot, installation is free.errr*
** yay! and a sales personnel thought we're wifey and hubby, CJ and I*** EEERRRR!!!!
We had dinner at her place.. yep... all the delivery hotlines are listed in a lengthwise greenish paper placed in her fridge door. We ordered at this chinese resto. rice toppings, siomai, seafood platter (that came in a box-where's the platter??? -_0 ), fried noodles and spareribs. i stayed there till 9:30 pm..and now am here. doing nothing.
some-some:
Red Auerback died at 89 - the greatest coach of NBA ever. won 8 titles for Boston Celtics.
Reflexes & Killer Drivers - First was when we were on our way to the hospital, A Jeepney infront of us suddenly halts to pick up a "pasahero" in a slight sideways manner not even close to the effin side...half of the jeepney's body is still in the middle of our way. Cj had to steer quickly to the left just in the middle of the road and two big trucks are coming towards us. Next was on our way to CJ's place when suddenly a a fast moving taxi suddenly overtakes this jeepney infront of him which puts the taxi's on our lane, just right infront of us! Cj again steered quickly now this time to her right.. good thing she has great reflexes. or else.. or she's uhmm used to this kind of drivers here.
Krispy Kreme to invade Philippines! at last...! theyre now branching out here!! i wont have to miss their Powdered Strawberry Filled, Chocolate Iced Creme Filled, Glazed Chocolate Cake, and of course the Original Glazed!!! (I wanna try their new Cappuccino Doughnut by Marco Pierre White)
oh..and it must come with their very own coffee! i always have Americano or Espresso!
and because i just miss these a lot.. when i get to heathrow i MUST go to terminal 3!!! and stay there for hours just eating Krispy Kreme! hahaha!
Hazimeister
